RED X

It’s odd logging back into SL after a long absence. It’s not unlike booting up the xbox and playing an old game you used to  know all the moves for only to find that you don’t remember where your guns are or how to jump over obstacles: only with SL it’s an inability to walk in a straight line or talk to people.  I always used to tell people who said “I’m tired/bored of SL” that that was a problem which was easy to fix, they conveniently put a big red X in the upper right hand corner for just such an occasion. I used mine and once used it lasted a considerable time. I’m back now and unlike video games, SL doesn’t wait for you at your last save point while you were away.  One difference I’ve noticed so far is that when you log into an old console pew-pew shooter, the game itself hasn’t changed half the bloody rules while you were otherwise engaged. I’m all out of date, stumbley, twitchy and awkward like a drunk at a wedding. 

eye_poloI spent my entire first day obsessing, “does everyone have a mesh face now? Does every man have a beard? Did I get taller? Why is my left eye floating outside my head – is that a glitch or some fashion thing that was popular just before I left?”  I’m not used to second guessing myself or noticing this kind of shit so it’s not only odd logging back in, it’s hard.

Yes I tried going to a few “noob-friendly” help areas for some assist but it’s tough to get help when the help you need is like – you know you have a HUD but you can’t remember how to attach it, or where it’s saved, or what’s it’s called, or what it does.

They have their hands full with the real noobs who are eager to learn and willing to listen. They probably don’t need the distraction of some “I USED TO BE GOOD AT THIS” dude who doesn’t want something explained to him, he just wants enough of a hint so he can remember himself, and thus feel like he figured it out on his own – technically, kinda.

So if my first day / but not my first first day was a lot of confusion and weeping, I can’t imagine how crazy it must be for genuine new starters. I’d conduct a poll and do some in-depth interviews on the subject if I wasn’t already bored of the idea as I’m typing it out.  I’m sure it’s no great revelation but I have (re)discovered that SL is disorienting.  I played leapfrog to help me get back into the swing of things and it got a little better.

Side note, leapfrog is when you go to a destination from the SL guide and TP out by following a link from the picks tab of someone nearby, then do it again at the next location. And the next. And so forth and so on. If you end up in a place with no people, you have to walk till you find someone else to profile pick/port. It’s marginally more fun than I make it sound. Though, that said, it was only 20 mins before a TP took me to a 1950’s Americana-styled garage that had eight heavily pregnant women standing around in a circle talking. Old me would have instantly wondered what was the deal and dived into a fact-finding conversational gambit. New me freaked out and ran away. SL: It’s not only odd logging back in, it’s downright odd. Perhaps that’s what makes us come back?

Charming, debonair, respectful of others and welcomed wherever he goes - Zero is none of these things. An unselfconscious reprobate, a shameless drunk and an ill informed opinionated prick of the highest order.

1 Comment

  • Reply November 4, 2016

    Chief Editor

    It’s not a “Red X”, it’s a white X on a red background. You’re fired.

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